On tuesday, I came home from 5 days away. My dog Maisie had gone to stay with a good friend while I was gone. My beloved 18 year old Tabby cat, Edward, stayed at home, while a whole team of friends who loved him, came by several times a day to feed and pet him. On Tuesday morning, I got a call from my friend to say Edward wont come out from under the couch. I laughed. When I got home in the afternoon, I found a sick and bewildered cat. A trip to the vet, and he was diagnosed with kidney failure. Blood tests showed a urea level of 91. The normal level is 3-10. Most cats die at about 25. He was dying – the vet couldn’t understand that he was still alive. I was grief stricken. That evening I had a new Calling in The One group starting. I couldnt stop the flow of tears…. and in that vulnerability, hearts opened in the group and people connected in a way that might have taken much longer. Today is Saturday and Edward is still alive, very weak, wobbly and confused, but still connecting with me with love and a light in his eyes. He is not eating or drinking. I have told him I will be OK and that he can go when he is ready. I have been thinking about what this rare, gentle, intuitive and aware Being has meant to me and I wrote a memorial for his grave. Here it is.
Edward – Rare, Aware Cat and Extraordinary Being of Light
My companion, friend and spiritual teacher.
He taught me about acceptance – To be peaceful with whatever is – or isn’t.
He taught me about love – to smile and purr and connect deeply – to love and accept everybody just as they are, to cuddle, to touch and to love being touched –and to be grateful. His gentle spirit and charm always won hearts.
He taught me about Presence – to live in a state of deep, peaceful awareness, effortless ease, and magical Presence- and to be happy for no good reason at all. He was always right here, right now with a wisdom deeper than my understanding and a purring peacefulness. I could just fall into his eyes.
He taught me about fun – to be ready to play and enjoy whatever is happening. To go from total rest to warp speed in a nanosecond – and to never underestimate how fast he was! And oh! – what a footballer he was – his fancy footwork was an art to behold.
He taught me to ask for what you want, clearly and cleanly
And he taught me about complaining – by never, never complaining – even though his hips must have been painful for most of his life, and towards the end, through his quiet acceptance of the illness that took his life.
I love you Dear Edward. You will always be in my heart. Maisie and I will miss you more that I can say – as will all your friends who love you and who have recognised who you are.
Fly free and joyful dear One
“I have known three zen masters in my life, and all of them were cats” Eckhart Tolle
I love this poem by Dr Bernard Gunther, about his cat, “Rumi”
swami rumi .. is a yogi
aways ..stretching …yawning …breathing… meditating …in harmony
he is unity .. the infinite…formless..no one
playing form …fur fun
Beautiful and loving tribute to Edward.
Thinking of you sweet Grace – and beautiful Edward as well – perhaps he’s gone forth by now. I’m a little late …
Never was a cat more recognized for his awakeness, never was a cat more loved. I’m so happy to have known him!
Thank you for this exquisite post.
With love
~ miriam louisa
Thank you Dear Miriam. Yes, he left on Valentine’s day on a beautiful evening, and died in my arms on the back deck. The wonderful kind-hearted vet came to help him. He tuaght me such a lot, right through his illness and death. It has been a prividge. I will write another post about it. much love to you ~ Grace